Meow
by Ireadtomuch
Summary: Harry Potter got a lot of things in life he didn't expect. At the top of the list was accidentally traveling back in time to the age of the Queen's Watch Dog... Did I mention he has kitty ears? MasterofDeah!Immortal!Harry! Sebastian/Harry RATED M!
1. Our Hero:  The Begining

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Kuroshitsuji! All rights belong to their respective owners. This plot was adopted from Silver Melody217

The only thing I own so far was this opening idea of a partial cinematic record movie theater for wizards. Awesome huh?

AN: This story is rated M for Mature! And this story is slash meaning boy on boy meaning gay content. Don't like don't read! Reviews will be cooed over and flames bragged about since they are a right of passage for authors and I have yet to get one

AN: This will contain citrus written for you by my perverted Beta FEARMEfrancis

Pairing for this story: Sebastian/Harry (cat boy, duh)

(I am a line break stop looking at me!)

"Sit right down ladies and gentlemen and prepare yourselves for the show and performance of a life time! I, Grell Sutcliffe, shall take you on this daring journey and show you a story so emotional, so interesting, and so heartbreaking that you will never find another to compare!" proclaimed a voice from the shadows, a voice that emerged as slowly as the speaker did. Revealing a sharp teethed crimson haired man.

"I shall start at the beginning by introducing our star, Harry Potter. You may think you know him, but I can honestly tell you that you are all wrong. For this Harry Potter led a very different story than you're used to." Proclaimed a boisterous and flamboyant acting crimson haired man as he danced around the room.

"Harry Potter had never wanted a lot from life. Nor had he expecting anything much. He had planned on one day getting a nice job finding someone he loved to marry- of either gender- and settle down and have a hoard of children, either adopted or his own. Life, however had different plants for Harry Potter.

"You see, Harry Potter was a wizard. WAS, since now he is much more than that, but that will come later. Now: Harry James Potter was born a wizard, after his parents died he was sent to live his mother's sister and her abusive family. Ten years of forced servitude, starvation and beatings later and Harry Potter received the letter that would change his life. His Hogwarts acceptance letter.

"Now some of you might be wondering why he was so excited to be invited to a school named after a pig's pustule. Well, it just so happens my young and clueless friends that this 'pig pustule' is the greatest school for learning the art of magic in Europe. Now your ignorance has gotten us off subject. Stop interrupting me with your loud thoughts and let me continue!

"Now Hogwarts for the average student was pretty standard, as they only heard of little Harry Potter's fantastic and dangerous exploits in the castle. To them, it was just the exciting story they got to hear at the end of the year, nothing else. For Harry and his friends, however, it was much different.

"Not many eleven year olds face a bunch of enchantments made by teachers, and survive. Much less in Harry's case survive a possessed teacher trying to kill them.

"Nor do many students have to deal with being ostracized for an ability they didn't have, nor did they have to face a basilisk, an active horcrux, or have a teacher try to erase their memories.

"Most thirteen year old little boys aren't told a murderer is out for their blood have dementors take an unhealthy interest in them, find, and confront said murderer only to find them innocent and then help then and a condemned hippogriff escape.

"Most fourteen year old boys are not forced into a tournament, ostracized by most of the school (again) and win only to watch their new friend die.

"Most fifteen year olds are not publicly slandered in news papers by the government, terrorized and tortured by an agent of said government, invade the building of said government to save their falsely convicted godfather, only to find it was a trap and watching their godfather be killed.

"Ironically most of little Harry Potter, and now I am talking about his stature, sixth year at school was normal… if you include practically stalking a peer who was a death eater, finding a horcrux and being ordered to by his mentor to feed him poison get the horcrux, get back to the school having his mentor killed in frount of him, and finding the horcrux is a fake.

"And finally, the 17th year of his life, on the run , finding horcruxes, destroying said horcruxes and the end of what would be the school year culmination in a battle in which he lost many friends and loved ones.

Yes this was little Harry Potter's life sad yes?"

"Hey! Put away that hankie! I'm not finished, and I refuse to be interrupted by nose blowing! Humph! You people are so presumptuous as to interrupt me like that! You're lucky I like you all so much or I would have quit long ago. Now where was I… oh, yes, I was just getting to the good part which is where our story starts."

"Along the way of Little Harry's mad adventure he gained the loyalty of three very powerful objects: The Deathly Hallows!

"… What are the Deathly Hallows? Were you raised under a rock! What is happening to the school systems? Honestly! I am not explaining these in detail. Look them up on your own time. I'm not being paid enough to tutor you in History as well as tell the full story of Harry Potter's life." ranted a fuming Grell Sutcliff

"Basically thee magical items give you mastery over death, the elder wand, the resurrection stone, and the clock of invisibility. Well most idiots think just finding them is enough, but no you have to gain their allegiance. They will test you, and little Harry Potter is the only one to date who passed those tests. He actually tried to get rid of them, like that worked!" Grell said exasperatedly.

"I've gotten off topic and it's entirely your fault again! Now stop distracting me, and if I start rambling stop me!"

"Now Harry Potter tried to get rid of the Deathly Hallows and tried to go on to a normal life. He started with trying to become an animagus. Well, the first attempt failed spectacularly, culmination in his ears turning into cat ears and having a tail even in human form. Then he finally succeeded and he found his form was an Egyptian Mau. Unfortunately for him, little Harry Potter, still referring to his lack of height, was not going to get a normal life.

"It all started when he met a strange, and slightly creepy, long silver haired and scared man. Now, I am not going into detail; that's for later in the tour of Harry Potter's life, but basically the man told Harry that the Deathly Hallows had made him King of the Shinigami,or death gods whose job it was to reap the souls of those destined to die watch their life in the form of a cinematic record and judge them accordingly. Needless to say Harry tried to run from the creepy man, failed and in an act of desperation over powered and messed up his apparition taking into the far past, to London in the Victorian era. The age of the Queen's Watch Dog.

"Now I'm done with my part of the tour if you'll follow me we'll get you seated in the time traveling invisible and intangible chairs. Now Ladies and gentleman you won't be able to get up, but don't worry for you no time will pass. Remember they can not see, hear smell touch or even taste anything you do. But to ensure you don't bother your fellow patrons silencing spells will be put on you as well as the sticking charms! Now pick a seat, there are menu's for drinks and snacks that will come up at some point during the cinematic movie. Now every one comfy? Good! enjoy the show!"

"This is a story of the ages ladies and gentleman, a story that will suck you in, a story that will only be told once, and you are the lucky viewers." Proclaimed Grell in a theatrical striking a rather embarrassing to look at pose.

With that the long red haired shinigami known as Grell Sutcliff pushed the red button and sent the annoying wizard patrons in their tour of their precious savior's life.

"All I did was go on a second rampage, destroy half a castle and dye King Harry's hair red! Its not fair that I be forced to endure this in order to pay for damages! And the uniform is so hideous!" Wailed the red head shinigami only to have the supervisor smack him over the head.

"Grell you have another load of customers coming through! Get to it!" He barked.

Grell eeped and practically ran to the entrance.

Mean while the people silenced and sticking charmed into the chairs watched as their savior landed in a heap on the street in cat form injured… only to be picked up by a little girl….


	2. Our Hero: The Pet Cat

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Kuroshitsuji if I did Harry Potter would have blatant Yaoi in it and Kuroshitsuji would have a lot more juicy content

PS: I blame my Beta FEARMEfrancis for bring my inner pervert out in the open. A few months ago she was safely kept chained in a closest and only released under highly supervised conditions… now she's running loose and I can't seem to catch her.

Warnings for this chapter: none

BETA'D By: FEARMEfrancis, my lovable perverted beta and friend

Chapter two: Our Hero: The pet cat

-I am a line break-

When he landed Harry was in a world of pain. So much so, that he nearly passed out upon impact. Pain seared though him like liquid fire. He could not bring himself to move. As it was, Harry was only dimly aware that he was in his animagus form. The world to him was nothing but a pain filled blur of color and sounds.

People were passing him. That much he could make out. They stepped over him as if he were nothing more than garbage. They were more than happy to ignore the broken and battered kitten on the street. He had been lying on the cold street for about ten minutes when something changed. A feminine squeal of horrified shock.

"Oh, you poor thing!" cried a young girls voice.

The color pink was the next thing he was aware of and the rustle of stiff, silken skirts and petticoats. Blearily he looked up. The saddened and horrified face of a young blonde girl was looking down at him, tears evident in her eyes.

"Paula, we must do something! We can't leave him like this!" She cried tugging on a woman in brown dress.

Any more of the conversation was missed by Harry as he blissfully sank into quite calm of unconsciousness.

-I am a line break-

When he next awoke the first thing he noticed was he was warm. No longer was he on the cold unforgiving cobble stone street, but instead on a pillow stuffed with goose feathers. A slight flex of his muscles gave a flash of pain but not nearly as severe as before. Once thing was certain, his broken limbs were set with splints and his chest bound in soft bandages around hid broken ribs. Within easy reach was a bowl of shredded chicken and a saucer of cold cream. Harry's nose twitched in appreciation of the delicious smells.

Slowly he lifted himself on his good side and tilted his head towards the delicious treats. A few dainty bites of chicken and sips of thick cream later and he contentedly fell into a deep and comfortable sleep. Unaware that his savior; one Elizabeth Middleton and her maid Paula, entered the room shortly after to cover him in a warm woolen blanket, and of the argument, tearful pleading and negotiations that took place during his slumber that would cement his stay in the Middleton household as Elizabeth's pet cat.

-I am a dancing mouse-

The next few days were touch and go for the newest and mostly unconscious member of the Middleton family. The vet that had tended him was astounded he was still among the living and called him a miracle kitten, for any other kitten with such injuries would have surely died. Suffice to say that with in a week Harry was awake and well enough to totter with in a few feet of his delightfully fluffy goose down pillow.

While he was still very weak, Harry was mentally as sharp as ever. He was constantly gauging people, if they were threats, who did what, who was who… and who would give him extra cream if he did something cute. Hey he may be an animagus but his little kitty tongue loved the fresh sweet cream no if, ands, or buts.

In a months time he was finally freed from his bandages as made his first tentative steps out of his sick room and into the rest of the house. Shortly after he was given by Elizabeth his young owner, much to his chagrin, a green silk ribbon with a silver tag reading 'Emerald'. Not a terribly original name, but it would do Harry supposed.

At first he wasn't sure what to think of his new owner. Since he owned her a life debt he could not and would not leave her. Generally she acted like an air head, who was more concerned with being cute than anything else. It was the rare insightful moments he saw of Elizabeth in her home that showed the nature he had seem while he lay in pain on the streets of London, a kind and caring girl. Eventually he was allowed into her personal quarters and found his thoughts on her to be quite true. She was a very caring and strong person. She was an accomplished swords woman, a prodigy if you will, but due to her being female, due to the time she was born into and for the love of her missing fiancé she acted as was expected of noble women, sweet, and cute, with no head or anything not pertaining to fashion, parties, gossip, or other approved areas for women.

A few months later saw the return of her beloved Ceil. From what Elizabeth had confided in him her pet cat, he gathered that the boy had been kidnapped and held for months on end by some unknown kidnapper. She confided the joy of seeing him the sadness of seeing him so changed, and the horror to find this captors had blinded one of his eyes. That night she wept. She wept for joy, for sorrow, and for the pain Ceil must be in and gone through. She cried for his lost innocence and decided to do all in her power to make him happy once more.

Things continued in this manner for a few more weeks. Harry would have been content to remain in his cat form, only changing back into his human one for short periods of time to keep himself from getting stuck, if it hadn't been for an incident. One evening Harry had left the house in his cat form to play along the edge of the woods. The sun was fast setting when he noticed Elizabeth out on the grounds.

"There you are Emerald! I bought a new outfit for you I want to you to try it on!" She cried happily brandishing to Harry's horror a pink silken baby doll dress.

She never got the chance to put it on him, as in that moment a man jumped out from the bushed and grabbed her. The man in question was a desperate business man down on his luck. In his mind if he kidnapped the daughter of the Middleford family they would pay him what ever he wanted for her safe return. Harry, seeing the threat to his little owner and hearing her cry out in alarm and pain as the man snapped her wrist in the struggle, with out thinking transformed into his human self and launched himself at the man. His magic slamming into him, knocking him unconscious.

Harry upon realizing what he had done, not only knocking out the man in an impressive display of power, but turning from a kitten into a human slowly and slightly fearfully turned to look at Elizabeth. The girl was frozen in shock cradling her broken wrist to her body. For a moment she didn't comprehend that Emerald had changed into a short, effeminate looking man with cat ears and a tail. Then she thought she was dreaming, which a sharp pain in her wrist ruled out. Then she thought she had imagined it and been saved by a stranger. But Elizabeth was quick to realize the truth. Her beloved pet kitten had changed into a short effeminate man with cat ears and a tail, saved her and was now looking at her with slight fear. Then it hit her. Emerald was afraid she wouldn't like him anymore and get rid of him.

There was a moment of tense silence and neither of them moved. Then Elizabeth flung herself at her Emerald and hugged him crying into his chest. Harry hugged her back slowly still unsure of her reaction. After a few minuets Harry pulled away and used his magic to find and repair the break in her wrists. Inwardly he was worried about what he was going to say. He couldn't tell her he was a wizard. That could get him into a lot of trouble and Elizabeth her memory erased. Not to mention possible experimentation on himself in the department of mysteries. Really, how many time traveling immortal Egyptian Mau kitten animagus were there? Not many, which meant the Unspeakables would have a field day.

Harry was still unsure of what explanation he would give Elizabeth when the girl came up with her own.

"Why didn't you tell me you were an Egyptian cat god?" She asked innocently nearly causing Harry to fall over from shock.

Quickly and carefully Harry skimmed Elizabeth's surface thoughts, careful to leave all her personal thoughts alone. In her mind he was an Egyptian cat, which meant he was from Egypt and with the Egypian craze the Victorians' had, her mind in this situation went from Egyptian cat to Egyptian cat god. Mentally Harry sighed. Well this was both unexpected and a perfect cover for what he was. Besides if what they crazy white haired man said was true he was king of the death gods so that made him a god right?

His attention turned to the expectant tear streaked face of his litter owner. He smiled.

"I was worried you wouldn't like me. You saved me and I owe you more than you know Miss Elizabeth.' Harry said using his voice for the first time in months. Luckily it just came out quiet instead of scratchy.

Elizabeth's answer was to smile and give him a hug then pull away with a worried face. "Does that mean you're going to leave now that you saved me?" She asked Tearfully.

Harry panicked. He hated seeing Elizabeth sad… and he had never been good with girls crying.

"No, no, not at all! I like living here with you! If its alright with you I would like to stay but no one can know that I am a cat god, to them I must remain a simple pet cat." Harry reassured his little owner who was smiling a watery smile at his answer.

"I'm really glad you want to stay, Emerald. I would be sad if you left me!" She said once again enveloping him in a hug.

Harry with a smile hugged his little kind hearted owner. She had really grown on him. He saw her as a little sister. And while she still saw him as her pet cat, hopefully she would come to see him as another big brother. When they broke apart Harry happily banished the would be kidnapper to the police station with a letter explaining he had attempted to kidnap a noble man's daughter as was incapacitated by her body guard, then happily shrank back down into his kitten form. And shortly after was scooped up by Elizabeth and carried to the house. Harry purred in contentment as she scratched his ears and carrying him back to the nice warm house. The promise of fresh cream only increased the volume of her purring friend.

-I am a dancing cat who is chasing the dancing mouse-

A few weeks later Elizabeth, who now told him to call her Lizzie, decided it was high time for a surprise visit to the Phantomhive mansion to see her beloved Ceil. This spur of the moment visit had been in part ported by a conversation with Harry she had had earlier that morning.

*** flash back Earlier the same day***

"Do I look cute in this, Harry?" asked Lizzie to her Currently human shaped pet cat.

Harry looked up from the plate of cake and cup of tea he had been enjoying.

"You look cute as always, Lizzy" smiling fondly, the cat animangus told his owner "I'm sure Ciel would like it"

Elizabeth twirled around with a giggle "You really think so?" she asked with a happy smile at the thought of her fiancé.

She brightened when he nodded but frowned when she noticed his attire.

"Harry, why aren't wearing the clothes I bought for you?" she asked, tears threatening to come out "Don't you like them?"

Harry, total sucker for tears especially for his little owner, scrambled immediately for a reply and kneeling in front of her

"Ah! It's not like that!" he said as he wiped the tears of his young owner "You have to remember that no one but you knows about the real me! Don't cry, I really like those clothes!"

"Really?" she asked tearfully.

Harry nodded "How about I'll wear it when we come back here?"

Elizabeth stopped her crying "You really would?" she asked again and hugged him when he nodded. "Yay!" she released him and walked towards the door

"Let's go, Harry!"

With that Elizabeth Middleford walked out of the room an Egyptian Mau kitten in her arms chattering about the things she would need and having the footman get a coach ready.

*** End Flashback***

When they arrived it was obvious Ciel wasn't home but that didn't deter his litter owner. She proceeded decorate the home in a massive whirl wind of pink lace and glitter. Then turned her attention to the servants whom she tackle hugged and dressed all the servants, save the maid, in what she deemed cute clothes.

The poor gardener was in a hat with bunny ears and had furry paws tied to his hands. The cook had a bonnet and bib placed on his head The maid was lucky enough to get away, but the poor old man servant was whisked away with Lizzie and himself to a separate room where Lizzie proceeded with a complete make over for the old man.

Harry could sympathize with these poor unfortunate souls. He loved little Lizzie, he really did, but he was after all Lizzie's pet cat, and as such was frequently dressed in 'cute' doll dresses in kitty form and treated to frequent makeovers and clothes changing in his human form. As it was, if he were to chance into his human form now he would be wearing the sailor suit Lizzie bought him with green instead of blue. It was complete with matching socks, shoes and he still had the ribbon and name tag around his neck, though since he revealed himself it was thankfully more of a tie than a big girly bow.

Lizzie was just putting the finishing touches on the old man when the doors burst open with a bang.

Lizzie looked up and a smile lit up her face.

"CIEL!" She cried joyously as she pounced on her Fiancé.

Harry was enjoying the show when He was suddenly scooped up by the tall butler that had been accompanying Ciel.

"NYAAAA!" _Lizzy help me!_ Harry silently pleaded to his distracted owner as he was suddenly picked up and cuddled by one cat loving, black butler of the Phantomhive Household, one Sebastian Michaelis.

'_GET THE BLOODY HELL OFF ME!' _Harry hissed

Sadly, Sebastian did not know cat-speak and continued to be oblivious to the scratching and struggling Egyptian Mau, deep in his Cat Paradise Haze.

Harry struggled valiantly against the strong hold of the butler who was fondling his ears, stroking is tail and all in all cuddling his struggling form to his body a slight flush playing about his cheeks as a dreamy look crossed his face . Harry had been planning on being nice, he really had. But the butler refused to let him down. No matter how much he wiggled and squirmed, the damn butler just cuddled him tighter. The man had the audacity to rub his cheek against his! He even took his paws in hand and started pressing on the bottoms making his claws spring out and retract! He had some nerve!

Harry tried something he had never done in cat form. He sprang out his claws and swiped at the offending cuddle bug of a butler who wouldn't take no as an answer. The horrifying thing was the Butler seemed to take no mind to it. In fact it seemed to thrill him. The man started to speak.

"Cats are so sublime! Nothing is cuter! They don't talk about useless things, or do them. Their fur is so silky and their paws are so soft. I could do this forever"* The Butler cooed.

"NYAAAAAAAH!" Wailed Harry in protest; wiggling even more in the attempts to escape from the butler with a cat fetish.

'_HELP ME!"_ Harry yowled in Cat speech.

But no one paid any attention. The servants were cowering from Lizzie and her truck of pink clothes, Ciel her fiancé, was still in the grips of Lizzie's crushing hug and Lizzie herself was in a Ciel induced haze of happiness. Harry was on his own.

Harry had but one last option. Desperate times call for desperate measures and all that. Quicker than the eye Harry let himself transform into his (mostly) Human form. Ears and tail with standing he was human.

"GET OFF ME! LIZZIE HELP!" He cried with his human voice causing the room to freeze in shock.

Especially the butler currently cuddling a boy where the adorable cat at had once been. A Boy who had the same Emerald green eyes. The same green ribbon and tag around his neck. The boy… who had cat ears and a tail. That were real!.

"Sebastian put the boy down!" Yelled Ciel to his butler.

Sebastian released the boy having recovered from his moment of shock, mostly. Harry scampered away from the Butler over to his little owner, fixing his rumpled clothes and staring warily at the Butler with a cat fetish.

'Who is this Lizzie?" Asked Ciel in a would be calm voice.

"That's Harry I saved him when he was in cat form. I kept him as a pet and he turned out to be an Egyptian cat god!" Said a happily smiling Lizzie unaware of the effect her rooms had one everyone in the room but herself and Harry, Though the effects on a certain black clad butler were noticeably minute.

A loud cry of "WHAAAT?" echoed across the formerly silent room.

Harry's ears twitched in annoyance of the noise.

'This is going to be a long day." Harry Mentally thought as everyone in the room save Elizabeth turned to look at him in shock or in the case of that damn butler an assessing look.

"Umm, I can explain?" squeaked Harry upon seeing a spark of lust in the Butlers eyes.

Yes, this was going to be a long and painful day.

~END OF CHAPTER~

* Mostly quoted from Kuroshitsuji Manga chapter 5 pages 21,22, and 23


	3. Our Hero: On Loan

Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji or Harry Potter if I did there would be lots of Yaoi!

AN: Forgive the late update this is due to three reasons:

1: _I AM A PROFECTIONIST! _

2. _I FINALLY FOUND A JOB _

3_. ISSUES IN MY FAMILY _my great grandmother 'Dearheart' who will be 94 on the 23rd of September is not doing very well. She has a history of strokes and her mind which was just three years ago sharp as a tack is starting to fade. I have been devastated.

But as she once told me _**"For a person born into this world with a doctor saying I would not live the night I have seen and done far more than many in this world get a chance to " -Dear Heart-**_

**So though she doesn't read my work and doesn't know the first thing about the internet or computers I would like to dedicate this entire story to my Great Grandmother. One of the Bravest and Strongest women I have every had the privilege of knowing.**

**Chapter three: Our Hero; On Loan**

It had been difficult but with the pressure he was under Harry had managed to come up with a not only believable, but plausible story. Well, believable to someone who was the Queen's Guard Dog and who dealt with supernatural things and beings on multiple occasions. Harry's story that he had been kidnapped to be sold on the black market and in a desperate move escaped heavily injured in his cat form was quite plausible. The fact that that damn Butler had confirmed that he has a vague since of divinity around him as if he were a demigod, or had yet to fully accept his roll had helped in the matter.

Through out the entire explanation and the story's judging Harry had been hiding behind Lizzie. Or has Harry mentally put it 'being the rear guard'. Truth be told he wanted to stay away from that grabby butler. That lustful stare had still not left his eyes.

He had fervently hoped when the visit was over Lizzie would take him home and he would never have to come again. Unfortunately, while Lizzie was much more than she seemed, she was still ignorant to some things in the world… such as lust. So when Ceil on Sebastian's covert suggestion had asked to 'borrow' him for a while to help him, Lizzie had happily agreed. In this way she could still be 'cute', 'sweet' and helpful with out being 'scary'.

Harry wanted to cry.

When Lizzie went to get into her carriage Harry had tried to run after it to climb in, but had been caught by the collar of his shirt, a position reminiscent to how some people grabbed him in his cat form, and restrained him while the carriage drove away.

"Sebastian, since you thought this… creature could be useful you take charge of him. I do hope he is competent." Said the little Earl with a smirk on his face as he watched Harry try to escape his butler's iron grip.

"Yes, My Lord" was Sebastian's dutiful reply as he scooped up the struggling Harry who was by then struggling with all his might and his demands to be put down were laced with heavy cursing enough to make a seasoned sailor blush to his roots.

"Noo! Don't let him take me! Lizzie come back!" Wailed Harry at the top of his voice as he was carried up to the servants wing of the Phantomhive estate.

This just seemed to amuse the butler as he looked down at his struggling burden. Yes, it would be fun having him here, but he would have to play things delicately if he was going to avoid catching a run away cat every couple of days. After all, cats do as they wish.

Quickly and efficiently to Sebastian, meaning impossibly fast by normal people's standards, Harry was not only assigned a room but before he could blink his clothes had been changed from the sailor outfit to a foot man's uniform. He could have sworn he had been groped as well, but it happened too quickly to be sure.

"Your job, while here, will be as the young Master's man servant you will choose his clothes for various occasions, sort his mail and act in part as his secretary. You will also be required to help him dress if I am unable to, as well as be able to pack properly and efficiently for a long trip at a moments notice. Any mistakes and you will be… thoroughly punished" Sebastian proclaimed leering at Harry's body.

Harry for his part glowed crimson at the lustful stare. He was sure he didn't want to know what would happen if he messed up. The tone in which Sebastian had said he would be 'punished thoroughly' left little to his imagination.

How did he get into these messes? Fate just had it out for him he was sure of it. First there had been that whole creepy thing with that old guy telling him he was King of the Shinigami, then he wound up in Victorian London of all places and was nursed to health by a little girl. Well, that part was fairly normal since he had been in kitten form, but the fact that these people just accepted he was an Egyptian god was weird. Weirder than weird.

As Sebastian left the room saying he had to be down at 7 o'clock to attend the young Master's dinner, Harry indulged himself in a sulk, his ears drooping. He didn't want to be here! He wanted to be home with a cup of honey tea and a slice of treacle tart.

Harry's ears drooped still lower. He wanted to go home. He forcibly pulled himself out of his sulk at ten till seven and made his way towards the dining room. Gods forbid he be late. He wanted that Butler to leave him alone.

For once, when not in a life or death situation, Harry was on time to an important event and got unto place a minute before the earl was seated. Harry could, and would easily admit he hating having to stand by and watch Lizzie's fiancé eat lobster bisque, followed by a crisp salad, and rare roast beef and potatoes. He was hungry he didn't want to sit and watch that kid eat! He wanted his own dinner. It was the dessert that nearly killed him.. A treacle tart which the little brat ate ever so slowly… enough that Harry was practically a puddle of goo on the floor by the time he was done.

When they were dismissed Harry nearly ran over the others to get to the kitchen. He was in luck! A single slice of treacle tart remained from the dinner. Harry pounced.

"HEY!" Came the yell from Bard the cook as the slice of tart he had managed to snag was snatched up and a bite torn out of it by the cat boy.

Harry turned to Bard, the tart hanging out of his mouth and head cocked, unknowingly looking for all the world a perfect picture of adorable innocence. Needless to say Bard didn't have the heart to demand the slice of tart back now.

"Eh, never mind go ahead but I get you're dessert tomorrow!" groaned out Bard, blushing slightly and rubbing the back of his neck as Harry turned back to his tart purring in delight.

Dinner went off with out a hitch after the initial incident. Everyone had what they wanted, it was noted that Harry had a glass of cream with his bisque and another with his beef. The general chatter about the next days chores and what they planned to do when they got some time off blurred into a soft and comfortable mix of voiced as Harry unconsciously curled up and fell asleep on his chair.

The next morning Harry woke in an unfamiliar bed. It took a second to orientate himself, but after a few seconds he remembered the pervious day's events. He was in his new room at the Phantomhive house. Assuming that soon it would be time for him to help the other servants prepare the house for the day Harry, grumbling, got to his feet and stumbled sleepily over to the wardrobe.

With the efficiency born from life at the Dursley's Harry was washed and dressed in less than ten minuets and half way to the kitchens five minuets later. The kitchens were deserted when he got there. Looking at the clock that read 6 am he could tell they were already running behind, and the others were most likely being dragged out of bed by that evil butler Sebastian.

So Harry pulled out a frying and put it on the stove. He loaded it with wood and a quick wandless incendio later and he had a merry fire going and the over and stove top both heating. Harry let the pan warm on the stove while he quickly assembled the produce for the days breakfast.

Soon bacon and eggs were sizzling in the pan, and dough was being rolled out for a breakfast pastry. Lizzie had told him time and time again that her beloved Ceil had a huge sweet tooth. So Harry figured a sweet pastry would be welcomed by the young Phantomhive for breakfast, even it he never heard a word of thanks for it, ungrateful brat.

He had just finished kneading the dough and setting it aside to rise when the others came in, being half dragged by Sebastian. The formerly sleepy faces perked up at the smell of food. Harry was quick to dish them all a plate of eggs, bacon, toast and poly them with tea before turning back to thinly slicing the apples he had washed. At seven o' clock in the dot the kitchen was full of the tantalizing scent of fresh apple tart, and Harry was working on the warm double cream that would accompany it. Shortly after Harry had everything plated it was whisked up by Sebastian and added to the cart.

Harry jumped, he had been so focused on the cooking he had forgotten about the pervert butler.

Sebastian smirked " I will serve this to the young Master. If it is not up to par you will be punished for it." A grinning Sebastian informed the cat boy. Who in turn hissed at him.

After the demon of a butler left Harry sniffed. That man was a perverted jerk! Harry had half a mind to say screw the statue of secrecy and curse him into a pile of goo, but the paper work and fines in this day and age would not be worth it… never mind that in this time period not only had be not been born but he was penniless as well.

Oh well, one could dream. Harry applied himself to his hasty breakfast of an egg and bacon on toast and hurried to the Master bedroom where he would help Sebastian dress the young earl. As it was Harry arrived in time to be directed to the young master's shoes which needed to be shined before the young noble even entertained the notion of putting them on. A quick but through shine later, Harry was putting the shoes on a thirteen year old boy.

'The nobles of this era were certainly spoiled if nothing else. With out their servants they probably would all starve and sit around naked' Harry mentally gripped as he fixed Ceil's socks as well as shoes before being directed to bush the earl's hats clean.

It was scarce thirty minuets later that he was informed to pack three trunks with a weeks worth of clothes for every occasion. Cursing liberally under his breath Harry began packing for a week long trip to London. The Queen had sent a letter about the recent bout of prostitute murders.

'This is the year that the Jack the Ripper incidents occurred.' Harry Silently mused and he packed the third and final trunk.

"Pack your uniforms you are coming too." Sebastian said startling Harry as he seemingly appeared out of thin air.

Harry glowered at him, but all that got him was a chuckle as the man scooped him up and started scratching his ears. Harry tried to protest he really did… but he couldn't concentrate. Damn his cat ears and their sensitivity. Damn Sebastian for his expert ear scratching skills!

Suddenly Harry was jerked out of his ear scratching induced haze of pleasure by a sharp pain on his ear. That bastard of a Butler had bitten his ear! Harry popped out his claws and swiped at the butler's eyes. Sebastian chuckled and released the cat boy who ran off with out any idea what had just happened.

Unbeknownst to Harry Sebastian had not bitten him for the pleasure of it alone. Now a seal was forming on the cat ear under the soft sleek fur. A claiming mark. Harry was essentially Sebastian's now. For no matter where he went or how hard he tried to hide the mark would call out to Sebastian telling him all he wanted to know.

Sebastian smirked. He had marked a demigod as his pet and lover for all eternity. Best of all, with his ears and tail he would never grow tired of him, so he would have to get rid of him for a replacement. Yes working for the young Earl of Phantomhive was very fruitful indeed.

The trip into London was both bumpy and uncomfortable for Harry who was not used to the carriages of this time. He was more accustomed to apperition, floo travel or even cars. Traveling in a carriage was another story all together. Inside the carriage was stuffy. At least to him, and the seats though covered in soft leather and plush cushions could not soften the bouncing of the carriage on the cobble stones.

Needless to say, half way to London Harry had transformed into a cat and tried to take his frustration out on the cushions… only to be scooped up and cuddled

'Damn you! Can't you keep your bloody hands to yourself?" Harry yowled in cat speech taking great pleasure in shredding the butler's uniform jacket to make his displeasure of both the bumpy ride and the pervert known.

This was all ended when Harry was grabbed by the scruff of the neck. He was surprised to see that the one holding him was Ceil.

"You keep that behavior up and I will suggest to Lizzie you need to be taken to the veterinarian to be neutered" Was his simple but truly evil treat.

Harry's ears were flat against his head and once released he quietly curled up on a cushion in the corner. That was one threat that Harry would take very seriously.

They arrived in London by mid morning. Sebastian had changed his coat and shirt for a new one, and Harry was back in his human form. Harry exited the carriage last grabbing the young earls bags and taking them to the Master bed room to be unpacked and put away. He arrived down stairs to see they had visitors

In the sitting room were three people. A woman all in red, her butler a rather skittish looking man, who had an aura of power around him, and a Chinese man who was dressed in blue silk.

Harry was not entirely sure how to proceed so he settled for standing behind Ceil's chair ready to fetch anything should it be needed.

"Why Earl, I see you have yet another handsome man in your service… a quite adorable one. The cat ears just add to it!" Cooed the red woman whom he had seen fondling Sebastian's back side earlier.

Harry struggled and failed to conceal his blush and upon hearing her coos at cuteness reach a new level decided then and there to keep out of arms reach. So far nearly everyone he had met in this time was a pervert.

Just as Harry had suspected the earl was investigating the case of Jack the Ripper. Harry himself had no idea who the culprate had been…. Errr who it was. Even the aurors at the time had been unable to solve the crime all that was confirmed was a weird magical residue at all of the crimes scenes… some had more than others. Almost as if there had been two culprits and one was a muggle who had been around the strange magic almost constantly for quite a while, thus picking up a faint residue which was left at the crime scene.

It was decided that they were to go to an associate of the earl who would have information on the crimes. He had been to the crime scenes and more if what was to be implied was true.

As they all piled into the carriage, Harry taking his cat form so everyone could fit, Harry couldn't help but wonder what the truth behind the old… now new mystery was. The feeling of foreboding told him he would find out.


	4. Our Hero: And the evil box on wheels

Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji or Harry Potter

AN: Sorry for the long time between updates. Family drama and a recent death in my family successfully killed any and all creativity I had a few weeks back, I am writing this update in hopes of bringing myself back to life in a manner of speaking

Warnings for this chapter: Possibly OOC Undertaker, I will try my best with him but he just doesn't like me, I must not be funny enough. And Harry/Emerald gets into trouble with Sebby and needs to be punished so while its not quite citrus I thought I would give a heads up.

* * *

><p>Harry or Emerald as he was now constantly being called really hated carriages. If he could he would burn them. He had only been in a carriage three times (the first time didn't count he was unconscious) and each trip made him sore, nauseous and uncomfortable. Hopefully they were going to reach their destination quickly he wouldn't put it past that evil pervert of a butler to punish him for getting sick.<p>

For once luck was with Emerald. The torture device known as a carriage came to a stop… out side an undertaker shop. A strange place for information.. But what ever as long as he got out of the stupid box on wheels.

Emerald sprang from the carriage and chanced back to his human form looking grumpy, green and glaring at everyone in close proximity.

'I want to go home!' he mentally whined as the pervert masquerading as a butler forcibly scooped him and carried him into the shop while he was still to nauseous to defend himself. All Emerald could do was glare daggers at the man as various scenarios of how he would kill this pervert flashed threw his head.

'I kill him with a rock or something! Then we'll see whose ears he's fondle then, I shall have my revenge!' He mentally crowed while outwardly sulking as the butler set him down and pat his head.

Any more thoughts of vengeance were wiped from his head when a creepy voice filled the shop.

"Wel~come Earl! Do you want to see what it feels like to sleep in one of my custom made coffins?" The voice said as a coffin opened to reveal..

"AH ITS YOU! THE CREEPY GUY WHO WOULDN"T LEAVE ME ALONE!" Yelled Emerald at the top of his lungs pointing an accusing finger at the man emerging from the coffin.

All eyes turned to Emerald in confusion before a slightly crazed laugh filled the room. The man was slumped over laughing hysterically and pointing at Emerald who's ears dropped in a sulk. This wasn't funny that guy was seriously creepy.

"Well Mister King -giggle- I can't say its not a -giggle- pleasure to make your acquaintance -laughter-." The man said between fits of laughter and giggles.

Emerald just back away slowly from the crazy man.

"Undertaker we're here on important business" Ceil cut through the man's laughter with ease.

The man turned and smiled at him.

"Yes I know exactly why you're here." Undertaker said grinning. "Have a seat I'll make tea."

They all found tentative seats on the coffins... All save Emerald who was scooped up in Sebastian's knee and unable to flee due to being lost in ear scratching bliss.

"You want to know about Jack the Ripper, everyone does and this isn't the first time I've handled this kind of thing" The Undertaker said off handedly handing out tea in various urns and beakers and offering his homemade bone shaped cookies.

"Isn't the first time what do you mean" Asked Madam Red a bead of sweat running down her cheek.

Emerald who's ears were being assaulted at the moment caught a nervousness coming off her that seemed slightly off however before he could get a better look at her his ears were once again under Sebastian's evil yet wonderful ministrations of doom and all thought was lost to him.

When he came around it was to an absolutely filthy story. Emerald face turned bright red. Sebastian had abandoned his ear scratching to preserve the young Earl Phantomhive's 'virgin ears'. When it finally ended after an hour both Madam Red's and Lau's mouths were taped up.

"Well Earl its your turn" giggled Undertaker.

"Emerald gave you a laugh before does that not count?" The young man asked.

"~NOPE!~" Undertaker practically sang.

"It can not be helped" Said Sebastian who scooped up a struggling Emerald in his arms. "Everyone please step outside for a moment and no matter what ever you may hear don't come in."

He then rushed everyone save Emerald and Undertaker from the shop and closed the door. Before carrying a struggling Emerald over to Undertaker.

"Have a look at this" Is all Sebastian said before pushing aside some of the fine hairs on Emerald's right ear.

Undertaker took one look at his bared ear before bursting into uncontrollable laughter tears streamed down his face and he pounded on one of the coffin lids. Emerald hissed at the sudden and slightly frightening loud noise and scratches scrambled and bit to escape the steel like grip of the Phantomhive butler.

When the others came in it was to a giggling Undertaker still weakly pounding on a coffin."

"What ever you want to know is fine" The man giggled out.

'Continue then" said the young earl.

" I always thought there weren't enough guests" The Undertaker said with a smile.

"Not enough?" prompted Sebastian.

"Yes not enough internal organs of course. Organ study is a hobby in my spare time" He mentioned offhandedly not aware of the effect he was having on his guests who were drinking out of the storage containers.

"The prostitute weren't full women anymore… Because their wombs were gone. Recently these kind of guests have been increasing their entire bodies dripping with blood.. Its made me vary busy."

"Let's just say that there aren't very many people out on the streets late at night, But accurately cutting out specific organs couldn't be done by a regular person right?" Asked Sebastian

"You understand well Butler, I feel the same way. If he has to act within such a short time, He should slit the throat first. Then proceed to cut the stomach open its easier to succeed this way From the look of the culprits work, the cruel accuracy definitely wasn't carried out by a normal citizen. It HAD to be someone experienced. You should have been able to figure that out too Earl, Its very likely that the murderer is an expert. And he WILL keep committing crimes He definitely will unless he is stopped."

* * *

><p>Emerald couldn't take any more. He ran to the door to empty his stomach. The combinations of the coach ride, the gruesome details and the casual manner in which Undertaker spoke of it all made him sick. He sank down outside the shop and put his head between his knees in a desperate hope to calm him stomach.<p>

Emerald was completely out of it. He wasn't even aware he was in the evil wheeled box known as a carriage until they were over half way to the house. It took another few minuets to notice Sebastian was no longer in the coach and the one soothingly running their hand through his hair was Madam Red, and that she had rested his head on her shoulder. Needless to say when he realized this he turned as red as her dress. Madam Red just gave him a gentle smile that left him baffled as he sat up the blush still adorning his face.

They arrived home later than anticipated (Grell had gone the wrong way) and Madam Red was livid with her incompetent Butler. Emerald was looking forward to not having to deal with the perverted bastard butler (as he had mentally dubbed Sebastian) When Lau opened the door to reveal… the perverted bastard butler.

Emerald nearly threw a fit.

"Welcome back I've been waiting for you all for a while now. There is tea and refreshments in the lounge. Please come this way."

Emerald was about to follow the party before Sebastian placed a cup of cream in his hand and gave him a hard look that made him fidget.

"Drink that and head to bed. You need to rest" was all he said before taking his findings after the Earl and his guests.

'Maybe he isn't such a bastard after all' Emerald thought sipping his cream before falling into a doze on his soft bed.

* * *

><p>"I was wrong he is EVIL!" Emerald yowled as he was forcibly dragged back into the presence of Nina Hopkins lead fashion designer and all around pervert. His hands had been taped into thick padded gloved to stop his attempts to scratch the crazy lady.<p>

"NOOO let me gooo! I don't wanna be dressed up!" He wailed as Sebastian forcibly held him in order for Nina to properly measure him.

The prime suspect one Viscount Druitt was holding a party that evening. One that they were going to attend undercover to see if their suspicions were confirmed. Ceil was going as a young noble woman, Sebastian as his 'her' tutor and he had been signed up to his Ceil's companion/ ladies maid. His ears were to be hidden in a hat and he forced into a dress and all the undergarments for women of the time. Naturally he was fighting tooth and nail.

Finally Sebastian seemed to have had enough. "IF you'll excuse us for a moment Miss Nina I believe Emerald is in need of a talking to."

Before Emerald could fully comprehend the danger he had fallen in to he was dragged from the room through the town house and into the servants quarters. Emerald gazed up at Sebastian fearfully and the Butler's eyes turned red and the man grabbed his tail preventing his escape. He gulped. The next thing he knew Sebastian had bend him over his knee and swatted his rear. He yelped. He didn't have time for much else as another swat landed in the same spot. Emerald was now wiggling trying to escape Sebastian's grasp, before a particularly viscous swat caused him to still and his eyes mist over with the beginning of tears. It was after ten more hard swats to each of his cheeks that Emerald let the first tear run down his face and after two more he gave him.

"Alright I'll behave stop! Please I'll be good I promise" Emerald sniffled. Sebastian stilled then pulled the sniffling cat boy to his chest and scratched his ears for a moment before stopping.

"Good boy. Now lets go finish your fitting with Miss Nina and I expect you to apologize for your rudeness" Sebastian said as if he had done nothing more than scold a wayward child.

Emerald followed at a slightly subdued pace and his ears drooped. However when he got to the drawing room which had temporarily been turned into a studio for Miss Nina he did indeed apologize and endured the entire fitting with no complaints.

A few hours later saw Emerald dressed in a mint green with black accent dress, his ears completed by the matching hat and a silken fan. All ready to go infiltrate the Viscount Druitt's party.

As they climbed into the carriage Emerald sulked. He hated the box on wheels but his was nothing on his current anger at a certain perverted Butler masquerading as a tutor. As they road off to the part Emerald entertained himself with day dreads of turning Sebastian into a mouse and eating him. He would have his revenge come well or high water!

Just then out of the corner of his eye he caught the lustful look sent his way by Sebastian.

On second thought maybe he should run.

* * *

><p>AN: Yes shorter than normal but you have a vague Yoaiish moment there though so you should be happy.<p>

I want to thank DarkAngel048 for sending me a simple PM asking for an update, I think I needed that My creativity has taken a major hit and her/his simple request was kinda a mix of a wake up call and a kick in the pants so I hope you enjoy this update.


	5. The Revenge of the Cat(boy)

Disclaimer: DO not own

AN: Yes yes I know its been forever. Now before you guys start scolding me let me say my piece. I've have two family members die with in a year, have gained and lost a job, tried my hand at starting my own business (didn't end well), and am now scrambling to find a job to pay the bills.

So any and all flames will be used to set of 4th of July fireworks and I will just cackle at people moaning an groaning. Hey I love indulging in a bit of schadenfreude now and then.

So this is dedicated to my loyal reviewer minions and PM minions who stuck with me during the long hiatus that was life and the death of my muse. You guys are awesome you can have a cookie. BUT ONLY ONE!

Also this is a second dedication to BarrelofMonkeys with out their prodding I probably would have given up a hell of a long time ago. Thanks for poking and prodding and making me feel bad about not updating Monkey-kins

One more thing: A new feature at the end of my story is inspired by HuskyWalker. Who at the end of their story Little Seer gives a list of good stories to read. I will be doing the same. So please see the ending AN for some good reads!

And Yes I am glossing over the whole party thing it will be there but prominent

**The Revenge of the Cat (boy)**

Two things were certain. One carriages were evil and uncomfortable when not in cat for on someone's lap and Two corset were created by demons. They had to be. That bastard butler-demon thingy was surely evil enough to invent such a torture that women in their insanity would willing submit themselves to.

Emerald didn't know how they did it. He himself was constantly on the verge of screaming 'OW my twisted torso! OW!' How he held it in was a mystery. The time for his internal musing and screams of anguish had past however as they arrived at the Viscount's party.

With in moments of stepping inside the door Emerald wanted to bolt. It was LOUD. His poor ears were in agony and all he wanted to do was shift and find a nice big bed to hide under.

"Oh ye sweet place of dark quiet and enviable defensive position where art thou in my time of need?" Emerald quietly whined to himself only to have that smirking evil bastard of a butler pinch him in an unmentionable place in reprimand.

"Naughty kitty" Said the so called evil smirking bastard just loud enough for his ears to pick up through the ruckus around them.

Emerald glared. It achieved nothing but gaining him a chuckle and patronizing smirk as the butler in disguise disappeared among the multitude of guest. The result of that comment was one Sebastian would come to look back with a modicum of fear in future years. For in that moment the Emerald pet cat/boy of Elizabeth Middleton mentality reseeded and Harry Potter second generation marauder, silent back of the Weasley twins, prankster extraordinaire was brought forth.

The first thing he would do? Slink off to a hidden corner and shift. Then he would go find Lizzie, he could smell her, and alert her to the fact that her fiancé was somewhere in the vicinity. That should give that smug bastard something to do. Let him scramble to conceal that his dear young master was here, dresses as a girl no less. He would have to ward off Lizzie's search while trying to protect Ceil and keep people from noticing the disappearance of the 'young lady' in pink AND her companion because if one was found to be missing they would automatically look for the other for surely the 'young ladies' would be together in some corner gossiping about something coquettish and silly. The uproar once they were discovered missing however. Well Harry would give all the gold in Gringotts to see that butler cover that up.

However before he could enact what would be the prologue to the greatest chapter in pranking history

He herd a loud thump. Turning around in an instant to assess a probable treat Emerald saw that damn butler in a mask, a large trunk in his grasp, claiming to be the entertainment for the night, a magician. And the smug bastard was asking for volunteers to stab swords into the chain wrapped trunk with him in it.

"Screw my original plan!" Emerald whispered to himself as he ducked into a hidden servants passage and promptly banished his corset and transfigured his clothes into something a lot more manly.

With in seconds he was moving through the crowd to the front of the line so fast one would have thought he was nothing but a figment of their imagination if not for the slight bump he gave some of them. Moments later he was at the fount of the crown and snatching swords from a stunned Lau and jamming with through the trunk with such ferocity that the already horrified people were shocked that a ferocity stronger than that of Lau existed. Others tittered thinking it was all apart of the show. Inside the trunk Sebastian was in a fair amount of pain. The swords before had done little more than itch. But these! These were charged with that strange energy that his little kitten possessed, and DAMN did it smart.

Emerald inwardly cackled with glee as he shoved the swords through various sensitive parts of the human anatomy with various painful hexes and curses charging the blade.

'Suffer you bastard suffer' Emerald inwardly crowed as he charged the last sword with a week cruciatus cruse. Hey while he had morals the smirking bastard was a demon, it was LEGAL in the wizarding world to use any and all measures to protect themselves from such creatures. Even using the unforgivables against demons was fully accepted. Handy little loop hole that.

Sadly Emerald's sadistic fun time had to end. He had run out of swords and the smirking bastard would shortly emerge from the trunk. For obvious reasons he didn't want to be with in reaching distance of the bastard for a bit, plus he had a little shopping list he needed to take care of. Emerald promptly disappeared into the crowd of spectators moments before Sebastian emerged from the trunk seemingly unharmed, though truly he was very sore, to tremendous cheers and applause with a smirk on his face.

Sebastian immediately scanned the crowd for his wayward kitten but saw no sign of him. As he was about to search more thoroughly the Faustian seal connecting him and Ceil via their contract flared. The little lord was in danger and calling for his assistance. What… unfortunate timing.

Emerald the cat was confidently slunk down the streets of London heading towards The Leaky Caldron, and the gateway to the magical alleys concealed behind its doors. Soon he was shifting back to him, mostly, human form and transfiguring his already transfigured dress from a suit to a set of resplendent wizards robes. Once he was sure he looked appropriate for the fashion standards of the time for the wizarding world, which were ridiculously strict, He entered the pub, With out a glance he headed straight back and once he reached the little ally behind the Leaky he tapped the code for Parallelally.

Parallelally was the tourist and entertainment district of Magical London. It's shop were open later than Diagonally, but It didn't have the reputation that Horizontalally, its sister ally and subsequent red-light district had. Emerald would easily be able to find the objects he wanted here in one of the gift shops and the pet accessory boutique respectively. A few simple prank items and a whistle and Sebastian wouldn't know what hit him.

A quick stop into the newly opened Zonko's , pre store fame, and exactly three galleons and he had the basis of his revenge. Another stop into the pet accessory boutique, and a high way robbery price later, he had the final piece to the puzzle that was revenge of the demonic butler of the Phantomhive family.

One disapperation later he was at the back door of the Phantomhive town house. Using the key he had been issued upon his press ganging into the young earl's service he was inside and half way up the starts in hardly more than a blink on an eye. With an evil grin and a cackle that would have convinced any human listener that he was the devil himself Emerald went about putting his plans into action. Pleased with his preparations and after planting a few decoys in case the demon butler had a paranoid streak . With in the hour Emerald was contentedly back in cat form sleeping on a bed he himself had made, under the bed.

'People don't know what they're missing. Sleeping under the bed is the best' was the last coherent thought of Emerald the cat.

He woke early the next morning and quietly as he could slunk down to the kitchen to pour him self a cup of tea with a side cup of cream. A piece of toast and a kipper later he was about to go about the duties he had been assigned in the Phantomhive house when he was grabbed from behind and his ears were fondled by the dastardly, evil…incredibly good ear at scratching demon of a butler. It was a few minuets before Harry was able to shake himself from the sudden onset of ear scratching bliss. A quick shift of his nails into claws later he took a swipe at the butler and hisses at him.

"No I don't want my ears scratched! I want my breakfast cream." He said knowing who childish he sounded. He was banking on him acting more cat like distracting the butler from his usual molesting activates.

Sebastian didn't even get a chance to respond before Madam Red's inept butler Grell stumbled into the kitchen some how nearly knocking over the china cabinet while he was at it. Sebastian was successfully distracted from Emerald as he moved to steady the cabinet holding the expensive and ludicrously expensive and fragile china and glassware. It was then that Emerald took his chance and with a subtle pulse of his magic, disguised as a reaction to annoyance at the loud wails of the inept Grell, to activate the prank that would plague Sebastian for the next week no matter what he did. Sebastian now smelled of meat, and his person now carried a subtle compulsion charm aimed at dogs, oh so slightly altered by Emerald, to encourage dogs to chase after the scent.

One blow of a magical dog whistle charmed to be heard for miles also with added completion charm courtesy of Emerald hundreds of dogs with him the ten mile radius of the whistle started gathering around the house. As soon as that damn butler stepped outside he would be swarmed and stalked by any and all dogs in the vicinity. Luckily there was enough supplies for the people in the house for the next week, courtesy of Emerald making a second stop while in paralellally. It seemed that the search for Jack the Ripper would have to be put on hold. Or it would for the humans. Emerald had no doubt that the young Earl would still send Sebastian out regardless of his little problem. After all the Emerald had forgotten to acquire more tea, or any thing remotely required for making the earls precious sweets.

This was just the start of an interesting week. Emerald had taken the liberty of replacing the sugar in the house with salt. Those lovely tarts and pastries Sebastian had made for as breakfast options , tea and dessert? All make with salt. Yes Sebastian would be in for a difficult week. Emerald inner evil kitten was cackling with glee.

All he had to do was sit back and watch the show. Grell would only be able to be blamed for so much. After all it was Sebastian who bought supplies. Emerald went about the early morning hours as normal. While the two butlers went about waking and dressing their employers. Emerald polished the silver and shined the crystal to perfection.

The table for breakfast was set beautifully with a dainty cloth covered in lace and embroidery the delicate china was a robin's egg blue as were the silken napkins. Naturally he laid out the newly polished silver wear and crystal water goblets to be filled with the preferred cool beverage of the drinker. The final touch was the silver tea set with both tea and coffee pots as well as the accompaniment of cream pitcher and sugar bowl. The only bowl in the house actually holding sugar. He was responsible for making and serving the tea after all, and he wanted to stay on the bratty earl's good side if only so he could return to his comfortable life with Lizzie.

Everything was picture perfect by the time the Earl and his guests came down. It certainly wouldn't stay that way long.

Everything started as it normally would. A steaming cup of quality tea fixed to the drinkers preference, the first cup was either followed by another or a request for coffee. Their chilled beverage was chosen and then Sebastian came out and brought out a selection of pastries for the young Earl and his guest while listing the several options for their breakfast, It was in the middle of this explanation that the young earl selected a lovely looking apple turn over from the started pastries his Butler had brought.

It was a lovely golden color with it's top sprinkled liberally with coarse granules of sugar. He took a bite as he waited for Sebastian to list the various sweets he had prepared when the horrible saltiness of the pastry hit his taste buds full force. With out even thinking of etiquette the young Earl spat the mouthful of offending pastry across the table into Madam Red's lap who leapt up with a shriek the same moment Ceil turned to his butler livid demanding to know what his butler thought he was doing. That rant was bisected by Madam Red's screeching about etiquette and the horrid manners her dear nephew had exhibited and blaming bad influences for corrupting him, namely Sebastian.

This all scared Grell who leapt into the air and landed most inappropriately on Mao Rin. Which enraged the normally apathetic woman, who started raining down blows on the poor butler's head. This further angers a livid Lau who started yelling in his native Chinese. Emerald to avoid looking suspicious acted shocked and frightened and 'hid' curled in a ball in a far corner 'shaking from fear' or laughter which ever worked.

It took roughly ten minuets for things to calm down. The result was several smashed vases, a dented silver service, a severely bruised and bloody Grell, a shamefaced Ceil, a angry and disappointed aunt and one hell of a butler in a bad position.

Sebastian being a demon and therefore not above lying through his teeth proclaimed that someone must have broken in and stolen the sugar and several other food stuffs. And replaced the stolen sugar with salt and other items to delay discovery. While this soothed most of the ruffled feathers of the guests, Ceil who had experience with Sebastian's early cooking assumed Sebastian had messed up the food and ordered him to go buy some more of the missing items. After serving them the savory breakfast option of course.

As soon as Sebastian stepped out the door, as Harry being part cat did NOT want them him the house and thus had warded the house against them, was beset by dogs. Mutts, purebreds, pet, and strays every dog with in ten miles had congregated at the door waiting for the butler to make an appearance. They leapt at him intend on getting a nice sized chunk of the meat they smelt, the compulsion charm over riding the natural wariness they had when faced with the human guise of the demon. Fortunately for Sebastian he was too quick for them. A few flips and a couple leaps and he was clear of the dogs… Only for another way to come as the dogs in this area were drawn to him as well.

Needless to day Sebastian was annoyed by the time he got back to the Phantomhive house. This whole debatable of a morning had set them back fifteen minuets behind schedule add the five minuets he wasted avoiding the dogs, which led him to stealing ingredients rather than buying them. Now he had to rearrange everything on the schedule. And he knew exactly who was to blame for this. His little kitten had claws and needed to be tamed and he was just the demon to do it.

For the remainder of the week Sebastian tried to teach his 'little kitten' a lesson with varying degrees of success and failure. By the end of the week it was set firmly in his mind as well as Emeralds that they were evenly matched when it came to humiliating non lethal revenge. For Emerald all this did was reassure him that he could hold his own. It was also gained him a truce with the demon. For Sebastian all it did was cement the fact that Emerald WAS fit to be his make and he would finish marking his as thus at a later date. For now he would let the kitten think he had won. He was a smart demon after all.

And it was the Smart demons who learned the weaknesses of their quarry instead of going in blind. Yes, he would assert his dominance when it was lease expected.

End chapter

An: OK I hope you guys like it. This has been minimally beta'd by myself as I seem to have lost my previous beta somewhere. Please mail her to me if you find her.

Ok so decent fic that you should check out I have several genre to choose from

YUGIO:

Story: Written in the Stars

Author: TechnicolorNina

Summery: Yuugi's never been good at keeping himself out of trouble. When ancient magic gets involved, he'll learn more than a few things about himself as he tries to get home. Blindshipping/puzzleshipping.

In my humble opinion one of the best YGO stories out there

Story: Time is a Broken Glass

Author: Sanji Spellhart

Summery: After a failed summoning ritual, Atem and Bakura are brought from the past to the present and are dumped on Yugi and Ryou's doorstep. Takes place 5 years after the events of YGO. Puzzleshipping, and Gravityshipping. Lots of S and M. Beware sexual content.

For the love of all that is holy read this. The author is going to be updating this shortly, from what they have told me. This one is great and very funny.

HP+Inuyasha

Story: To Hell and Back

Author: Ashlynn Lionheart

Summery:Due to an unforeseen event, Harry is pushed through the Veil by the Ministry to prevent him from being corrupted by the Dark Lord. The Order can't stop it, Harry is helpless to prevent it and something goes very wrong with everyone's plans. Slash

HP

Story: Little Seer

Author: Huskywalker

Summery: Voldemort won the first war and Harry is happy to live as an unnoticed squib at Hogwarts. Unfortunately visions and rebels don't allow that and Harry soon catch the attention of the dark lord.

Story: Courtesan

Author: Drops of Nightshade

Summery: In the prejudiced world where the Dark Lord won, Harry Potter is part of the servile caste, the lowest caste in the new society. Resigned to a life of servitude as a Courtesan, Harry is instead drawn under the wing of the Dark Lord himself. Between the scheming Order and his powerful benefactor, Harry finds himself steadily drawn deeper into the growing conflict. Eventual LV/HP.

HP+Naruto

**Story: Piercing Snow **

**Author: Barrel of Monkeys**

**Summery: Dudley's innocent push starts Harry journey into Snow and beyond. An open wound grants him a wish. A mistake makes him the tool to the greatest man he had ever met. (A Harry is Haku story) Slash, violence, and a little bit of love. (Formerly Ice Ice Harry)**

**READ THIS! It was a fic written for me and Zabuza was loosely based on me when I am pissed off. A lot of his imaginative death treats are inspired by me too ^_^ I am very proud of my evil and bloodthirsty ways**.

AN: I will try to update another story of mine soon however I am going on vacation to… Conbravo! So I have to go on a little jaunt to Canada and the farthest North I've probably ever been. And for a southern girl like me that's a tad scary.

See ya later please feel re to review and rant and all that but flames will be ignored and whines will be laughed at and printed to put on my wall.


End file.
